The Universal Experience of Being Out-of-Sync
Linda Silverman, Ph.D.
. . . the experience of being different in cultures that value sameness, coupled with acute awareness of the pain and suffering in the world, make the gifted feel distinctly disadvantaged. Gifted children don't see themselves as winners of the competition, but bearers of the burden to make this a better world for all. They only actualize their potential when they discover a unique role for themselves which requires their particular gifts.
. . . Another way of understanding giftedness is to see it as developmental advancement. In every culture, there are children who develop at a faster pace from early childhood on, are inquisitive to a greater degree than their agemates, generalize concepts earlier than their peers, demonstrate advanced verbal or spatial capacities at an early age, have superb memories, grasp abstract concepts, love to learn, have a sophisticated sense of humor, prefer complexity, are extraordinarily insightful, have a passion for justice, are profoundly aware, and experience life with great intensity. While these traits may or may not propel the individual to world renown, they appear to correlate with moral sensitivity in childhood and ethical development in adult life (Silverman, 1994). Their sensitivity, intensity, awareness, and moral courage set these individuals apart from others throughout the lifespan. In some societies these characteristics are applauded while in others they are punished.
Giftedness is asynchronous development in which advanced cognitive abilities and heightened intensity combine to create inner experiences and awareness that are qualitatively different from the norm. This asynchrony increases with higher intellectual capacity. The uniqueness of the gifted renders them particularly vulnerable and requires modifications in parenting, teaching and counseling in order for them to develop optimally. (The Columbus Group, 1991).
. . . Internal asynchrony is due to differences in rates of physical, intellectual, emotional, social, and skill development in the gifted child. Uneven development is mirrored in external adjustment difficulties since the gifted person often feels different from, or out of place with, others . . .
A child's mental age predicts the amount of knowledge he or she has mastered, the rate at which the child learns, sophistication of play, age of true peers, maturity of the child's sense of humor, ethical judgment, and awareness of the world. In contrast, chronological age predicts the child's height, physical coordination, handwriting speed, emotional needs, and social skills. The greater the degree to which cognitive development outstrips physical development, the more "out-of-sync" the child feels internally, in social relations, and in relation to the school curriculum.
The intelligence quotient . . . should be seen as a minimal estimate of asynchrony--the extent to which cognitive development (mental age) diverges from physical development (chronological age).
. . . There is still another form of asynchrony that needs to be mentioned: the condition of dual exceptionality. The most asynchronous child is one who is both highly gifted and learning disabled. A remarkable number of gifted children have either recognized or undetected learning disabilities, such as auditory processing weaknesses (Silverman, 1979), writing disabilities (Silverman, 1991), visual perception difficulties, spatial disorientation, dyslexia, and attentional deficits (Lovecky, 1991). Marked discrepancies between strengths and weaknesses continue into adult life.
One aspect of the Columbus Group definition that we still have not addressed is heightened intensity. Cognitive complexity gives rise to emotional depth and intensity. Thus, the gifted not only think differently from their peers, they also feel differently . . . Individuals endowed with greater capacity for vivid imagery, intellectual curiosity, compassion and empathy are more likely to experience anguish when faced with knowledge of the cruelty in the world. These overexcitabilities create the foundation for moral choices, even in children.
. . . Complexity, intensity, and heightened awareness are lifelong attributes of the gifted. These qualities often result in extraordinary conscience, a need to make the gift of life mean something in the overall pattern of existence. Lost potential to be an artist or a great scientist or statesman is surely harmful to the individual and to society, but loss of courage to take a stand against injustice causes much deeper suffering in these sensitive souls.
The asynchrony that besets the gifted is both a blessing and a curse. If we view giftedness only within a competitive framework, then the most gifted among us are certainly the most cursed, because they cannot fit into society as it currently is, nor can they succeed by its standards. They are likely to be seen as defective in today's world; they lack the competitive drive to win and they cannot comfortably "play the game" at school or work, ignoring the power plays and moral infractions. Advanced, asynchronous development is not an advantage in a race toward personal gain. It does not give the individual an edge in the competition. Rather, the cognitive and personality traits that comprise giftedness are disadvantages in a society in which those differences are not valued.
. . .We who cherish gifted children have been entrusted with guiding and guarding the
future of our planet. With our help, these children's gifts will become blessings to themselves and to the Universe.
Linda Silverman, Ph.D., is a licensed psychologist and Director of the Gifted Development Center in Denver, Colorado.G-50; 10 http://www.gifteddevelopment.com
